50% Acceptance, 30% Terror, 20% Excitement [T - 39 days]

An Excitement rate of only 20% for a semester journey to Japan may seem dangerously low, but this is up from my earlier rate this summer of about 10% (with 88% Terror and 2% Acceptance). For the past few days I have found myself thinking, "Okay. All right. This is happening. Okay. I can do this. Here we go." And just today I have realized I don't have to focus on all the Terrifying aspects of going to living in Japan (laundry! groceries! the subway! strangers! homesickness! money! 13 million people!). Instead, I can focus on the Exciting things (making friends! new foods! music! sake! exploring! bonding! wandering! temples! malls! clothes!) and not be overwhelmed by Terror. Positivity: what a novel idea.

I've had to go easy on myself for being Terrified over these past few months. Part of me wants to hang onto my bed for dear life screaming, "NO! I DON'T WANT TO GO. I DON'T WANT CHANGE. YOU CAN'T MAKE ME. I WANT TO STAY HERE WHERE I UNDERSTAND THINGS." But hey everyone, it's okay to be Terrified. Really. It is. As long as you go out there and do it anyway.

Some members of my trip post on Facebook how many days it is until we leave. I do not enjoy this (it ignites the Terror), but I'm going to go look right now. Ready? (I'm not.)

39 days.

Crap, that's way fewer than I thought. Why did I look? Oh well. Too late now.

Slowly but surely all my documents and appointments and little things are coming together, and the next big thing will be Packing. How many tank tops do I bring? Which shoes? Will it all fit? Will it be under 50 pounds? I know it won't be too much of a nightmare, though, because I've always loved packing.

Look! Here's where I will be living:
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I hope to keep posting my pre-travel and abroad thoughts/photos/musings here. But no promises, people. I'm going to be very busy making memories, and I will love to share them with you all, either here or in person.